


The Art of Letting Go

by Cookieteller



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, Angst and Humor, Crying, Drunken Confessions, Drunken Kissing, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Humor, Fluff and Smut, Friendship, Gay, Gay For You, Hurt, Hurt/Comfort, Love Confessions, M/M, Making Out, Men Crying, Mild Smut, Wedding Night
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-25
Updated: 2016-12-25
Packaged: 2018-09-12 02:36:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,486
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9051865
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cookieteller/pseuds/Cookieteller
Summary: Oikawa and Iwaizumi goes out to have some fun before a certain wedding day. Things get out of hand. (Wedding AU)





	

"What a beautiful, cloudy day today am I right, Iwa-chan?" Oikawa exclaimed, sipping his cup of hot coffee.

"It's about to rain, Assikawa," Iwaizumi deadpanned, rolling his eyes playfully as he thought about Oikawa's silly tactics.

"What about the rain? The rain is so calm and beautiful, Iwa-chan," Oikawa chirped.

"Yeah, yeah. Whatever you say," Iwaizumi impassively replied, hiding his smile on the inside. "I can't believe that I'm going to get married to Adelaine tomorrow. I'm so nervous!"

Oikawa became silent, nodding his head in reply. Marriage may be a beautiful sight for most people but not for him; it was a nightmare that had become a reality. For all these years, he had a strong feeling of infatuation over his best friend, but he cannot muster the courage to confess because he might ruin their friendship. If only Iwaizumi knew how much Oikawa loved him then he would have been happy.

Oikawa averted his gaze from the ground just to stare at Iwaizumi's face; how his tan skin glistened despite the cloudy weather, his emerald, green eyes that would make a person fall into a deep trance, his beautiful smile that would make his white teeth shine bright like a diamond. And can I say that his black beanie suits him very well.

"What are you staring at, Assikawa? Why are you making that weird, puzzled look towards me?"

Within a second, Oikawa noticed his actions and averted his gaze towards his cup of coffee. 

"Nothing, Iwa-chan . . . I was just staring out of the blue," he muttered, forcing a smile of satisfaction. 

"Oh well. Anyway, where do you want to go next? We still have enough time before we head home."

The brunette pondered, but all he can think about was Iwaizumi's face. "Anywhere would be fine.  What matters is I get to spend my time with you," Oikawa softly smiled, inaudible for his best friend to hear.

Oh why did he have to feel all fluttery towards him today? Tomorrow is Iwaizumi's wedding day for goodness sake. He should make him happy at least, plus he will never get the chance to be with him anyway. 

"What did you say again? I didn't get to hear you thoroughly," Iwaizumi gave a clueless look, staring at Oikawa.

"Anywhere you want to go, Iwa- chan!" Oikawa exclaimed, his somber face turning into a cheerful one. 

His best friend gave him a puzzled look, wondering what the hell was going inside the brunette's mind. First, his face was gloomy and now he seems to be jubilant as ever. It might just be his male hormones acting up.

"Okay? Well, how about we go to the arcade?" Iwaizumi suggested. "And maybe we can have some shots before we head to our own houses, am I right?"

"Sure! I'm game! Let's go!" Oikawa agreed, shaking Iwaizumi on the shoulder.

"Okay! Now stop shaking me, Assikawa," Iwaizumi grunted.

* * *

The arcade was packed with people that were so loud that Oikawa started to flinch. 

"Hey Oikawa! Where do you want to start first?!" Iwaizumi shouted over the loud atmosphere.

"I don't know! It's up to you!" Oikawa shouted in reply. 

"How about we play over there! Just like how we used to back in our high school days!" Iwaizumi pointed.

The brunette looked at where he was pointing at just to find the dance machine laying there, empty.

"I don't know if I can still dance, Iwa-chan! I'm as rusty as a used up nail!" Oikawa cried out.

He remembered the days where he and his Iwa-chan would go to the arcade every weekend just to dance in that old machine. Now at the age of 27, Oikawa knew that he was not as good in dancing anymore. Yes, he was a volleyball player for the national team but that does not mean that he could dance like a pro like he used to before.

"Hey, I'm sure that you are much better than I am. You're so much faster than I am since you're an athlete. I'm just a normal businessman that does those business-like stuff." 

"But you still work-out, which means you're still physically fit," Oikawa argued, flipping his brown locks as he did a sassy look.

"Ah whatever, let's just see if both of us still got those moves," he snickered.

* * *  
They have been dancing for hours now, their sweat dropping on the heated dancing platform. At this moment, Oikawa was on the lead by just a few points. Both of them were having a good time laughing despite being exhausted. People started to gather around the dancing platform just to see what these two full-grown adults were up to. Most of them cheered, making the arcade more lively than it had already been.

"I never had so much fun in ages!" Iwaizumi shouted, dancing like a total maniac. 

He was so focused in dancing that he forgot about how stressed he has been for the last few weeks. All he wanted to do was dance the whole night with his best friend by his side. It was still unbelievable that he was going to be married by tomorrow, which made him scared about the drastic changes that he would have to adapt.

"Me too, Iwa-chan! Me too..." 

Their intense dance battle finally came to an end, making their audience clap with excitement and joy. Most of them complimented on how amazing they were at dancing. Some girls even gave their numbers to Oikawa, telling him to call them when he had the time.

* * *  
They exit the arcade, laughing their hearts out, thinking about how they aced those moves that were thought to be impossible.

"You were amazing, Iwa-chan! Your moves were so fucking intense!" Oikawa exclaimed exuberantly, patting him on the back.

"Have you seen yourself?!  _You're_  the one that's amazing!" he replied back. "I can't believe we still got those moves after how many years! I thought that we were going to be stiff!

Looking at his Iwa-Chan made Oikawa develop a deeper feeling of love towards him. He was too precious for him to let go, and he doubt that he would move on when Iwaizumi gets married; he was just a big part of his life.

After walking for a while, they ended up having some shots at a small bar.

"Hey Oikawa? Thanks for spending your time with me today. I appreciate it," Iwaizumi smiled before drinking his second shot of alcohol. 

"Haha. Of course, Iwa-chan! You're my best friend right? Of course I have to be here for you especially now because this is your last day of being a single man!" Oikawa snickered.

"Yeah, I'm gonna miss you when I move to Tokyo. It's just so hard to leave all the good memories that I made here in Miyagi," Iwaizumi sighed. "You promise me that we'll still keep in touch right?"

"Of course! Of course! I'll try to call you at least every week. Is that ok?"

"Yeah. I'm so nervous for tomorrow, man. I can never imagine being a husband and a future father, ya know," Iwaizumi ran a hand on his spiky hair. "I feel like I'm going to be really irresponsible and that Adelaine will have to do all the work."

Oikawa held the ravenette's hand, smiling at him with reassurance.

"You're going to be a great future husband and father, Iwa-chan. That's why you don't have to worry because everything will go the way you want it to be. I'll always be here to support you even though you're married," Oikawa gave a sad smile. 

"Yeah, I guess you're right," Iwaizumi sighed. "I know that she loves me and I love her so there's nothing to worry about."

Iwaizumi smiled back, giving Oikawa a butterfly-like feeling in his stomach. He was like a dream that was unreachable, and the brunette knew that he will never deserve a perfect person like his Iwa-chan. 

* * *  
It was already nine o' clock in the evening. After having 4-5 shots of alcohol, Iwaizumi and Oikawa felt tipsy. They were laughing hysterically, talking gibberish about things that aren't even funny at all.

"Oh my god! There was this pig flying yesterday in my room that I started to scream like a girl!" Oikawa blurted, laughing so hard that he fell on the floor.

"What?! What was that  _pig_  doing inside your room?!" Iwaizumi shouted. "It must have been a . . . roasted one!" Iwaizumi bursted out laughing.

None of them even made sense to be honest. People would have perceived them as crazy people that have escaped from the asylum if they saw them now. 

A couple of hours passed, and the effect of the alcohol seem to fade away. Iwaizumi and his best friend ended up staying in the park where they used to play volleyball during their childhood years. Oikawa laid on Iwaizumi's lap, playing with the man's spiky hair.

"Hey Iwa-chan? Do you know how handsome you look?" Oikawa asked, his brown eyes sparkling in the night sky.

"Haha. Maybe, but not as handsome as you, dumb dumb," Iwaizumi snickered.

Ah, everything was going perfectly at the moment. Oikawa laid there in his Iwa-chan's arms like there's no tomorrow; he never wanted tomorrow to come. And then he said something that would change everything.

"Iwa-chan?" Oikawa asked innocently.

"What is it, Assikawa? Iwaizumi replied.

Oikawa blinked one more time before staring at the ravenette's green eyes. His mind wasn't functioning properly but he didn't give a fuck about anything at this point.

"I want to say that I love you, Hajime," Oikawa blurted out, sitting up in front of him just to see how his best friend's reaction. Iwaizumi looked at him seriously for a moment that soon turned into fits of laughter.

"Oikawa! Of course you love me! Don't get me wrong, I love you too! We've been friends for a long time, man! What's there not to love?" Iwaizumi laughed, wiping a tear away from his eye. "You don't have to be so serious about it."

"You know what I mean!" Oikawa blushed. "I love you as in I want to be with you for the rest of my life! I-I want you to be my husband and have kids with you in the future! Okay?!" Oikawa shouted, tears slowly trickling down his face.

And with that, Iwaizumi was consumed with nothing but silence. He never knew his best friend felt like this the whole time. Was he really that oblivious? It explained why Oikawa always flirted with him; why he always over exaggerates everything and sticks to him like glue. He felt guilty.

". . . You were always the one for me! We would have been together if it weren't for that stupid bitch! Why did you choose her, Iwa-chan?! Why?!" Oikawa continued to ramble. His face was red from all the tears that were flowing non-stop. 

Iwaizumi averted his gaze to the ground, having no clue on how to explain his feelings for his best friend without offending him. He wanted to reply but he was scared that it would agitate Oikawa even more. It stressed him out to see how devastated his best friend is; but how can he not let him down? Maybe the alcohol was the one responsible for all those words that were coming out of  Oikawa's mouth since he wasn't fully sober yet.

". . . I-I'm so sorry," Iwaizumi murmured, "I didn't know that you felt like this the whole time." 

The brunette stared at him, glaring at his best friend. How could he not know how he was feeling the whole time?! Was that how thick his head was?! Why can't he love him back like how he does? He knew him since they were a year old and now he has to marry a girl that he only knew for barely 3 years! It's insane!

". . . Why, Iwaizumi? Why do you have to make me suffer?" Oikawa muttered.

"O-oikawa, it's not like t-" 

"Don't even, I don't want to hear your excuses anymore. It's too late."

Oikawa stood up, giving Iwaizumi one last glare before walking away. Iwaizumi can't lose his best friend! Not today, not ever. The brunette was the one that cheered him up every time he was feeling down, had the patience when he was too stubborn to listen, and most of all, supported and understood him. 

He was  _desperate,_  desperate to do anything so he won't lose his best friend. Without a doubt, the ravenette went up to the brunette. He grabbed his arm and pulled him closer just to smash his lips onto his.  His mind was not thinking straight because his thoughts were only focused on cheering up his best friend. And that's what matters at this moment. Oikawa was shocked to find Iwaizumi kissing him,  _kissing him._

The brunette slowly wrapped his arms around his best friend's neck, giving him a warm sensation. He never knew that Iwaizumi was such a good kisser nor did he ever expect that this time was ever going to happen. It felt good - really good that he can never let his Iwa-Chan go. They laid down on the damp grass; their lips still intact. 

"I love you so much, Iwa-chan. . ." Oikawa whispered in Iwaizumi's ear.   
He bit the ravenette's neck softly, leaving a small reddish hickey. 

They kissed again, sliding their tongue at each other's mouths this time. Oh how good it feels; it felt like a dark paradise that would soon devour them both with regret. If only they knew what they were up against.

Oikawa let out a soft moan as his Iwa-chan bit his neck, harder than what he did earlier. It went on like that for minutes, leaving hickeys all over their necks until they both realize what they were doing.

"Fuck," Iwaizumi cursed. "What the fuck am I doing?!" 

Then comes the tears, tears filled with regret. Oikawa may be a good kisser, but his fiancée is going to kill him if she finds out that he kissed his best friend.

"I-Iwa-chan?" Oikawa stuttered, feeling tears form in his eyes. 

He loathed seeing his Iwa-chan cry. The ravenette's looked so vulnerable in front of him as his tears drip on Oikawa's face; those tears emphasizing the sorrow that the ravenette suddenly feel. Oikawa's heart broke, realizing that it was partly his fault that Iwaizumi kissed him. 

"Fuck, fucking shit," Iwaizumi continued, "I-I'm so sorry, Tooru."

And with those words, he stood up and ran away, never looking back at Oikawa again. The brunette wanted to chase after him, but his legs wouldn't budge. Oikawa sat up, touching the hickies that his best friend gave. Realizing what just happened, he burst into tears.

"THIS IS ALL MY FUCKING FAULT!" he shouted. "I'm a bastard, a stupid little bastard who can't keep his feelings for himself!" 

Oikawa broke down, pulling the grass from the damp soil. It was all his fault for venting at Iwaizumi; if it weren't for him then this would have never happened.

"It's all my fault. . . From all the days why did I have to make such a stupid mistake?" he sniffled.

* * *  
Oikawa sluggishly walked to his house, thinking about the foolish thing that he made, causing more tears to spill from his eyes. He was tired of crying; it made him look vulnerable to the outside world. 

He unlocked the door to his home and made his way to his bedroom, falling flat on his bed as he curled up into a ball. And there he cried himself to sleep.

...

It was three in the morning when someone rang the doorbell. Who the hell would ring the doorbell this early? Oikawa didn't want to move, but he decided to open the door anyway. He wearily walked to the door, grumbling with annoyance. He felt like a mess with his unchanged clothes and messy hair; he didn't want anyone to see him like this.

"What do you want?" he asked with an irritated tone.

Tears started to form again when he saw the person in front of him.

His Iwa-chan stood there looking as helpless and lost as he is. His eyes were blotchy from crying and his spiky hair was disheveled. 

"May I come in?" Iwaizumi asked, his voice hoarse, his green eyes becoming watery again.

* * *   
Oikawa and Iwaizumi stayed in Oikawa's living room. Silence filled the air and the only light was illuminating from the tiny lamp. Why was Iwaizumi here? the brunette pondered.

". . . so um, how are you?" the brunette asked awkwardly, fiddling with his shirt. 

Suddenly, Iwaizumi enveloped him in a hug, which made Oikawa too shock to move. 

"I don't even know what to do, Tooru," Iwaizumi murmured, trying to hold back the tears that were fighting to be poured out.

"What do you mean you don't know what to do?" Oikawa asked softly, rubbing the ravenette's back soothingly. 

Iwaizumi hesitated to reply, thinking about the consequences that his replies would bring him. "I don't know. . . if I-I should g-get m-married tomorrow. . ." With those words, Iwaizumi broke down, hugging Oikawa tighter now.

"I LOVE HER! I REALLY DO!" Iwaizumi cried hysterically. "But I don't know if I deserve to be with her. . ."

Oikawa sympathetically stared at his broken best friend, holding back his own tears. Iwaizumi rarely broke down, but if he did then it meant something much more. He knew that his best friend was strong, strong enough to tackle any problem that would come his way; however, there are some problems that are way too complicated to solve. Oikawa was mostly the one who cried while his Iwa-chan would always be there to give him comfort, but both of them were broken, just way too broken. Even though Oikawa knew that he had no chance to win Iwaizumi's heart, he will never stop loving him because he was his  _everything_ , and seeing him like this made him feel even more broken. They were like an inseparable duo that were somehow always connected.

"What if Adelaine finds out about that kiss?! She'll hate me!" Iwaizumi continued. "I can't live without her, Tooru. . . I just can't," 

It was heart wrenching, Oikawa was heart broken too, but he had to push back those feelings and be there for his best friend. The ravenette was always there for him during his break downs, and now is the right time to give back that favor.

"You kissed me because you were unconscious of your actions," Oikawa replied. "It's also my fault for saying those nasty things. . . I tempted you to kiss me after all."

There was silence for awhile before they continued. ". . . was it true?" Iwaizumi asked as he fiddled with his thumbs.

"What is?" Oikawa retorted, trying not to look at him in the eye. He definitely knew what he was asking about. It brought back the feeling of embarrassment which caused his cheeks to turn red.

"That. . . you love me and you want to stay with me forever," Iwaizumi muttered as he averted his gaze to the ground.

Oikawa leaned on his best friend's shoulder and sighed. "Yes, they were all true. I am in love with you," he felt hot tears swelling in his eyes again. "E-ever since I knew you had a girlfriend, I never stopped loving you and when I heard you were about to settle down, I was so devastated! Without me knowing that I began being obsessed with you. You are my everything, Iwa-chan. . . but I knew that you loving me the same way will never happen," Oikawa confessed before he burst into tears. He felt tired, too tired to cry again. 

Iwaizumi started to cry too, hugging Oikawa in return. They felt like boys who were crying over a broken toy; it's pathetic.

"I'm sorry, Tooru, I can't reciprocate your feelings for me; but you know that you are one of the most important people that I have ever know in my existence," Iwaizumi sobbed. "I w-want to reciprocate those feelings but I still love Adelaine, and I don't even know if I should marry her tomorrow because of my stupidity!" 

Oikawa had a deep realization. It felt like someone showed him the future. He knew that Iwaizumi cannot live without her and that his love for her was infinite. It may hurt him, but he would rather have the pain for himself rather than watch his best friend grieve the pain of losing his fiancée. He glanced at Iwaizumi, sniffling because of crying nonstop on the brunette's shoulder. 

"You should marry her," Oikawa sternly replied as he held Iwaizumi's hand, his soft hands. 

"W-what? What if she finds out about the kiss?! She'll never forgive me!" Iwaizumi exclaimed.

"If she loves you then she'll understand and forgive you; that's what love really is, am I right?" Oikawa gave a sad smile, rubbing his thumb on Iwaizumi's hand.

"B-but, what if she doesn't understand me nor does she believe with what I have to say?" Iwaizumi choked out, coughing from sobbing too much

"Then she doesn't love you at all." Oikawa bluntly replied. "I know that Adelaine loves you as much as you do, Iwa-chan. Your saying this as if you only knew her for a day or something! You're just being paranoid right now."

Iwaizumi looked at the brunette with his green gleaming eyes. He happen to observe how Oikawa's chocolate brown eyes glimmered under the yellow light that was illuminating from the tiny lamp; it gave him all the hope he needed.

"I guess you're right, Trashikawa," Iwaizumi gave a small chuckle, wiping the remaining tears from his face. "Wait, what if she sees the hickies though?"

"Then tell her the truth. She will be your wife after all, and couples don't keep a secret right?" Oikawa retorted, leaning on the shoulder of the ravenette. He had that cute smile on his face as he hummed a happy tone. 

"Thank you, Oikawa," Iwaizumi blurted. "I don't know what I'll do without you." 

Oikawa engulfed him in a hug, giving him a sad smile. "No, thank you. I wouldn't be the person I am today if you never entered my life. I just want you to know that I will never stop loving you even though you are already married." 

They stayed like that for a while until they both drifted to sleep, having their arms wrapped around each other as they enter a dreamless slumber.

* * *  
The wedding bells rang while everyone chattered away before the ceremony started. In the preparation room was a nervous groom who was fiddling with his bow tie endlessly.

"Oh shit, I'm so nervous that my hands are starting to become so clammy," Iwaizumi muttered as he did his bow tie for a millionth time. Oikawa laughed as he pat Iwaizumi on the back. It was hilarious to see his best friend this antsy since he was always calm.

"You worry too much, Iwa-chan," Oikawa said as he continue to laugh. "She loves you and you know that so don't worry about it! It will go smoothly, trust me."

"Er. . . I hope so," Iwaizumi said before regaining his composure. "Ok, let's do this."

* * *  
Oikawa's eyes only stared at one person in the entire room; his Iwa-Chan. He saw the gleam of his green eyes glistening under the lights when the bride entered the door. It still hurt him somehow. He did not pay attention to their vows since his mind was preoccupied with so many memories that he had with Iwaizumi. The ravenette had shed tears from saying his vows; it made Oikawa tear up again. He thought that he had this "connection" with the ravenette but it turned out that connection was nothing special for Iwaizumi at all; it was just a figment of the brunette's imagination.

* * *  
It was already the evening. Everyone chattered away at the reception as they congratulated the newly weds. Even Oikawa seem to be smiling right now while he chatted with his old teammates from high school.

"I can't believe our ace finally got married! Am I right, dear?" Hanamaki smiled as he wrapped his arms around Matsukawa - at least they ended up together. Oikawa suspected that something was fishy between these two back in their high school days.

"Yeah, time sure runs fast," Oikawa deadpanned.

"You all right?" Matsukawa asked with concern. If only they knew his real situation.

"Yup! I'm just really exhausted," Oikawa replied happily, pushing back all the agony that he is being conflicted with. His friends gave him a skeptic look but shrugged it anyway.

"We'll get some drinks, see you!" Hanamaki waved goodbye as he held Matsukawa's hand and left.

Oikawa sadly smiled as he stared at the beautiful garden scenery right before his eyes. 

"If only I can feel his warm touches again, I would cherish it forever. . ." But he knew that he will never get the chance to feeling his best friend's warm lips against his nor will he feel the soft nibbles that were given on his neck.   
"It was good while it lasted," he sighed.

The music started to play a soft romantic song. Great, just great. He was feeling like shit right now and the music  _had_ to make it worse. He looked at everyone as couples began swaying to the music; hell, even single people were dancing to the slow music. He started to search for Iwaizumi until he felt a tap on his shoulder. The brunette averted his gaze to see his best friend smiling at him.

"Hey, Shittykawa," Iwaizumi softly greeted. "May I have this dance?" As he offered his hand. 

How can this be? He should be dancing with his wife, not him. Oikawa shivered.

"Wh-what a-about your wife? She should be the one you're dancing with," Oikawa nervously replied as he blushed hard. It didn't make sense! It didn't make sense at all! It's their wedding and now here he is, offering him to  _dance with him_. 

"Eh, I told my wife what happened yesterday and how you felt about me," Iwaizumi replied casually. "You were right, she did understand me. I was scared that she would break of the marriage but it turned out that she understood the whole situation. She even found it cute when I told her that you're in love with me," he chuckled. "So she suggested that I dance with you for tonight,"

"Y-you told her that too?!" Oikawa exclaimed, turning even redder. 

"I had to since she is my wife after all," Iwaizumi replied, scratching the back of his head as he gave a nervous smile.

Oikawa gripped the ravenette's hand, giving him a soft smile. All he needed was his Iwa-chan by his side. He moved closer to him as he leaned his head on his shoulder.

"Are you really sure that Adalaine is ok with this?" Oikawa murmured as he pouted.

"Absolutely," Iwaizumi smiled.

"Thank you, Iwa-chan. . . thank you,"

 


End file.
